Persistency through Failure
God used to give me grace to hustle, but He took that away
There is a polite version of “pivoting” that we like to talk about in professional spaces. It’s neat, it’s packaged, and it usually skips right to the happy ending.
But let’s talk about what happens when the pivot feels less like a graceful turn and more like a total collapse. Let’s talk about what it actually means to persist through failure when everything around you falls completely apart.
Walking Away From Crazy
Not too long ago, I found myself seeking the counsel of an Ombudsman before leaving my last professional position. It was a journey that required every ounce of my strength, but it gave me the courage to do something vital: I walked away from crazy.
I thought I was stepping into a peaceful place to transition. I thought I had a safe harbor to build my business and catch my breath.
It wasn’t so.
Instead, I stepped into an unemployment cycle and a toxic family cycle like no other. I kept my circle tight—holding everything close to my chest—because the craziness within both my immediate and extended family began to surge. Jealousy started showing up in people with both diagnosed and undiagnosed issues. They felt like familiar spirits, acting out the ancient scripts of King Saul’s envy and the betrayal of Joseph’s brothers.
On top of that, the dynamics shifted. A sibling I had historically helped could no longer rely on me because I simply didn’t have it to give. At the same time, jobs I was overqualified for—roles I should have easily been awarded—suddenly ceased their searches entirely, or were handed to mediocre, minimal-experience candidates to save a budget line.
And just to test my discernment, I bypassed a spiritual cult by the skin of my teeth. The leader was charismatic, knew the Word, and taught it well—but she bled her emotional trauma all over us and couldn’t shake a lying tongue. God has always given me the ability to see and sense motives. Once I realized I was sowing my hard-earned money into unfertile ground, I took my discernment and I moved on.
When the Business Doesn’t Take Off (Yet)
I truly believed my business would skyrocket right out of the gate. It didn’t.
The people I most wanted to help stood at a distance, peeking through the window. The ones who did step inside couldn’t prioritize the deep work because life’s competing priorities kept pulling them away.
I was broke, I was tired, and my financial world took a massive, undeniable hit.
So, I did what a Trailblazer does: I pivoted.
I didn’t throw the work away. I didn’t delete the business. Instead, I put my own oxygen mask on first. I stopped trying to force the external world to match my timeline, and I started focusing on my own healing and storytelling. I began sharing my life experiences through creative mediums, using AI to help tell the raw truth, and I poured myself into serving my church.
And a strange thing happened. The more I served and shared, the more I felt a profound release. It was an unshakeable calm right in the eye of the storm.
The Removal of the Hustle Grace
Among over 1,000 “no’s,” rejections, and closed doors, one thing remained burning in my heart: my love for working with cohorts of students—high school and college minds ready to make their mark on the world.
And then came the realization. God made everything outside of that core passion collapse.
This past weekend, in a moment of beautiful solitude, I looked at where I am right now: leading a seasonal summer program that matches the exact rhythm of what was always in my heart. I just put on my first program of the summer, and let me tell you, it felt incredibly good on the inside.
I realized a profound truth about how God is operating in my life right now: Used to, God would give me the grace to hustle. But He took that away.
He has stripped away the grace for the frantic, exhausting grind. He has left me only enough grace to do what I am exceptional at—the work that leaves a lasting, generational impact.
Getting Back to Basics
Sometimes, to persist, we have to fail. We have to let things fall all the way down to the bedrock so we can see what was actually built on solid ground. We have to let the wrong structures fall apart to finally arrive at the exact pathway God has paved for us.
It’s a stripping away of the noise, the toxic dynamics, and the false starts. It’s a return to the basics.
When God removes your grace to hustle, He isn’t punishing you. He is re-aligning you. He is forcing you to stand strictly in your zone of genius and your zone of peace.
Join the Conversation: Trailblazers, I want to hear from you today.
Where have you “failed” recently?
How did that exact failure break down a wrong door and align you closer to where God actually wants you to be?
Let’s talk about it in the comments. Keep your oxygen mask on.